NYHUUGGEE!

Tag: life

  • ‘That Which We Call A Rose’

    There has been some difficulty in the pronunciation of the first name of the new Ayatollah of Iran.  This is no small thing.  How would we all feel if people around the world consistently miss pronounced our President’s names like Barack or Dwight or Lyndon or Franklin Delano?  The problem seems to lie in the spelling of Mojtaba.  Is the J silent?  Is it pronounced J and how?  This isn’t English or Spanish.  

    We will need to write about him from time to time, so why don’t we just call him Mojito?  Mojito Khamenei.  Mojitos are fun.  Once we have a fun term everyone can use, we can avoid offending.  Something we try very hard to do, not offend, that is.  Oh yes Mojitos are a rum based drink that came from Cuba originally and they are quite tasty and depending on who makes them, can be quite potent.

    And yes there a other problems with Mojito Khamenei.  He might be in a coma.  He might have lost a leg.  He might need a lot of plastic surgery for his face.  But the biggest problem is, he might not be around too long.  Who will be next?

    And we hate to feel dumb.  But we don’t pretend to be experts, so well, we can be dumb.  But we don’t think anyone here, has ever heard of Kharg Island before.  Have you?  Seems that 90 percent of all of Iran’s oil goes through this heretofore never mentioned island but now on the lips of every expert, as it got bombed.  How come no one has mentioned it before?  We don’t mean Gamers who have been attacking this island for a few decades on their screens, but the Cognoscenti Of The Known World and the Talking Heads, especially the military experts among them.  Maybe dumb, is a thing that’s going around and we shouldn’t feel too bad about it.

    We get why the Secretary of War and our own Head of the Joint Chiefs wouldn’t mention it.  As why alert anyone to potential targets?

    And oh yeah how do you pronounce Kharg?  Sounds like “Car egg” maybe.  Maybe we should just call it Rose island.  That way we can link this article back to the title.

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    Title “That which we call a rose by any other name, would still smell as sweet.”  Juliet to Romeo.  William Shakespeare.

  • Do You Wonder…

    Does anyone else wonder about this label on certain hamburgers and steaks, that reads ‘Grass fed beef’?  We mean what else do cows do but eat grass all day.?  Are there Cows that eat something else?  Chicken maybe?  Seafood?  We don’t think so.  What’s the BFD with the “grass fed”?

    Does anyone wonder about these Tai Chi commercials.  They are all over the internet.  If you watch anything on Youtube you’ve seen them a hundred times.  There’s this guy and he’s like over 50 and he’s all trim and fit.  In fact, he’s ripped.  He has no fat anywhere.  We call him the No Fat On His Body Tai Chi Guy.  And he tells you don’t have to work out!  No stress, no strain just Tai Chi!  And you only have to do Tai Chi for 7 minutes a day!  Or sometimes there’s a woman like the wife or daughter of a guy asking.  “Can my Husband/Dad go from fat, to No Fat On His Body just like the No Fat On His Body Tai Chi Guy in just three weeks?” Then on comes the No Fat On His Body Tai Chi Guy and he says yes!

    Well we got a better solution than even doing Tai Chi for 7 minutes a day.  Just find the AI guy who made the video of the No Fat On His Body Tai Chi Guy and have him do an AI of you too.

    With six NFL teams at either 2 or 3 wins and 12 or 13 loses all vying for the coveted first pick in next season’s draft how many of you, like us, are wondering how much these teams really want to win their remaining games?  We don’t mean the players, some of whom will not even be back next season.  But like the coaches, the general managers, the owners and even the fans.  What’s another loss when you’ve already dumped 12 or 13 games?  Compare that to the number 1 pick.  It’s the difference between a lump of coal and sugar plum fairies dancing in your head.  

    We can see a lot of these teams going for it on 4th and long today.

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  • All Good Things…

    We can file this under all good things come to an end.  So, it’s goodbye to RHONY after 22 seasons.  That’s the Real Housewives of New York.  This show was a cultural phenomenon and a game changer.  It started off simple enough, a group of New York City Housewives and their daily lives.  But then the Housewives started screaming at each other and calling each other names.  Little wars broke out among the Housewives.  This led to the creation of a lot of other groups of Housewives in other cities all over America and even in cities of other countries.  All, of whom engaged in the same antics.  The cry of “You disrespected me?” echoed through the land along with “Can I trust you?” and “I can’t trust you!”.  

    Then the phenomenon took hold, as people in other venues began screaming at each other and calling each other names.  They got disrespected and wondered if they could trust anyone.  People on opinion shows that had heretofore simply stated their different views, now began to call each other names and not so nice ones either.  Then this spilled over into regular news shows and Podcasts which went uncensored and the name calling really got hot.  Last but not least to pick up on this, were the Politicians.  And modern political theater became a series of insults thrown left and right.  Then the American people began to wonder, if they were being disrespected?  And could they, trust anyone?

    You may be saying, it’s not all fault of the Housewives!  And I like those shows!  We’re not laying all the blame at their feet and people who took up the call are responsible for their actions.  But historians, anthropologists and sociologists of the future, will certainly see the Real Housewives of here, there and everywhere, as the focal point, of when everything, began to circle the drain.  And a whole lot of previously good things, began their descent into the crapper.

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  • Nice Work If You Can Get It

    Aaron Donald, Los Angeles Ram and three time NFL’s Defensive Player of the Year, has a Stalker.  She is Jenelle Anwar.  Usually the Stalker is a man and he’s obsessed with a woman but there are Stalkers who have been known to be female.  So that’s nothing new.  And celebrities have been known to have Stalkers of all kinds.  Some who break into their homes and some who even cause harm to them.  But Jenelle is a little different.  She wants a divorce.  Even though she’s never even been in the same room with Aaron Donald.  She filed papers in court and she wants $1,500 a month in alimony.  Nice work if you can get it and we guess you can get it if you try.*  That’s a riff off of a line from an old song.

    And Six time Jeopardy champion Andrew Hayes did not get final jeopardy in that sixth game but he was so far in front that the other two contestants couldn’t catch him.  He had 28,800 going into final Jeopardy and he bet 8,800 so he lost that 8,800 and only wound up with 20,000.  As opposed to 37,600 if he would have gotten final Jeopardy right or the 28,800 if he’d just bet nothing.  But leave it to Ken Jennings to put things in perspective when he said.  “Twenty thousand dollars for a half hours work, not too bad.”  Andrew lost in his 7th game but his six wins gave him $137,804.  Nice work if you can get it and you can get it if you try.

    Now the Enchanted Six pictured above, took to the skies in their Blue Origin capsule and landed to a chorus of boos.  Then came the memes making fun and the cruel jokes.  We won’t repeat them here as we don’t do nasty, even if it’s funny.  Well sometimes we do but we try not to.  Also people pointed out that the Blue Origin craft didn’t go up that high and it looked like a chance to take selfies more than a Space flight.  So they weren’t really Astronauts, as they claimed to be.

    In response to the negativity Gail King of the CBS morning show said she was like Alan Shepard.  Alan Shepard was the first American and only second man in Space.  He rode into Space on a first generation ballistic missile and it had a tendency to blow up during its tests.  Also Alan Shepard was a graduate of Annapolis, a veteran of WWII, a test pilot and one of the few men to walk on the moon.  So, she might want to re-think that one.  Also, Alan Shepard wore a helmet.  All Astronauts wear helmets.  The Enchanted Six did not wear helmets.  It would have ruined their hair, in the selfies.

    But don’t feel bad for Gayle King, she gets 12 million a year to read off a teleprompter, asks questions and talk about whatever.  And that is nice work if you can get it and you could never get that, no matter how hard you try.  Fugettaboutittitt!

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    * ‘Nice Work If You Can Get It’ by George and Ira Gershwin