Yeah, yeah we know there is a war going on but it’s just blah, blah, blah everyday with whoever you happen to tune into saying the same old, same old. Like they know what’s going on. Now we’ve put our military hats on and we know what’s going on but we’ll wait till the smoke clears before we give our analysis.
And there are other things happening in this world. Take those commercials that jump out of you whenever you’re watching something on Youtube and usually just when something got real interesting. Sometimes right in the middle of a word.
Hey we’re not complaining. We have to log onto a lot of sites and we just don’t want to pay the few bucks that will make the advertisements go away, so tough noogies on us. But we can’t help but wonder which one of these dumb ass commercials are the worst. We even have categories.
The One That Can’t Possibly Be True. There is this little box, designed by former NASA engineers that will cool any room in 90 seconds. Any room? You mean like St. Patrick’s Cathedral? Cost? 19.99? 29.99? Doesn’t matter you can buy a fan for less which is what this thing will turn out to be.
Don’t Try This At Home. A middle aged guy comes on and tells you. ” Forget Viagra! Don’t waste your money on those pills! I’m going to tell you how to get rock hard for hours! Just get some Vick’s Vapor Rub and…” Not only don’t try this at home but hit the that skip button real fast. Before you even think of it.
It Won’t Work But It Can’t Hurt. It’s a little drawing that shows a woman drinking a glass of water. Then a nice soothing voice comes on and says. “Drink a glass of warm water before you go to bed and your vision will improve overnight.” And when that doesn’t work don’t worry, as there are commercials that will tell you how they got something to stop you from getting up to pee three and four times a night.
Okay, okay there is a war going on and try not to get too stressed out. Remember the terrorists have won. The Russians are this fearsome military power, that will over run Ukraine in a few weeks. Global warming which was later changed to Climate Change, will cause the seas to rise, and the Polar Ice Caps to melt by the year 2000.
Dicens simle factum est
Pro Bono Publico
NYHUUGGEE! 